Screenwriting Manifesto

Good as they are, sometimes Internet search engines let you down. They only find matches for the words you know, which is great if you know the answer you want. But if you have a question, if you don’t know the search terms that match the answer — well, sometimes you end up chasing your own tail.

And sometimes, you get dumped off here, at Screenwriting Manifesto. So, for those of you that were led here believing you would find the answer, I’ve taken your search terms, reconstituted the question, and attempted to provide an answer. It’s just one of the little services I provide, the nice guy that I am.

Question: What are some major terms for screenwriting?

Answer: Whatever “theory” of screenwriting you subscribe to, it’s best to versed in a variety of popular approaches, just so you can communicate effectively in whatever “language” your employers happen to be speaking. And chances are, they are speaking whatever the latest trend or hottest book or buzzworthy seminar is speaking.

So, while I don’t necessarily recommend, you probably want a passing familiarity with the works of Syd Field, Robert McKee, and, lately, this guy.

If you really want to be prepared for anything, you can read Aristotle and Egri, but be warned, as a friend of mine once said, Egri is egregious — but at least when some trying-to-impress junior exec starts blathering on about a “unity of opposites” you’ll know what the hell he or she is talking about. Sort of.

Some old geezers like myself find the hero’s journey paradigm easy to grasp and a useful frame of reference when discussing story.

For a list of more practical, utilitarian terms, see John August’s Glossary.

Question: What’s the best place to live for screenwriters?

Answer: Your mama’s basement. And don’t leave until you have to.

Question: Why didn’t I receive a response to my query letters?

A query letter is generally a short letter (or email) introducing yourself and pitching your screenplay’s logline. The goal of the query is to convince the recipient (agent, manager, producer, etc.) to request to read your screenplay.

There’s nothing necessarily wrong with trying to get your screenplay out there in this manner, but you should understand that it’s very inefficient and likely to produce deafening silence, not read requests.

There’s mass of amateur screenplays out there, floating around like that infamous garbage barge that couldn’t find a harbor. No one wants the script barge to land on their desk. Barriers are put in place. Filters. Walls.

For good reason. Those screenplays suck. They are toxic. Reading just a few pages will make you give up on life altogether. They are that bad.

Trouble is, your script looks just like all the toxic screenplays — at least, from this distance it does. Somehow, you’ve got to distinguish yourself enough to get through the filters and over the wall. But a query letter is usually an unconvincing approach.

Because there’s another barge out there.

And it’s full of query letters.

I read somewhere that a direct marketing campaign of any kind usually produces a positive response of two percent. That matched my experience, many years ago, when I sent nearly 100 queries off to agents — and received exactly two positive responses back.

Even more disturbing — I received only a handful of negative responses. The vast majority of my queries disappeared into a black hole.

And that was the last time I ever wasted my time and and postage on query letters.

Until a few months ago when I queried Circle of Confusion via email.

Hey — they invited queries by email on their web site, and it wouldn’t cost me any postage. Surely they won’t, you know, just ignore me. I’m an MFA, dammit!

Yeah. Still waiting.