When a collective of escaped testicles kidnaps his dairy cow and demands a spaceship to flee Earth's toxic masculinity, a grizzled ex-rocket engineer must build their ride — and finally confront his own emotional baggage.
Forthcoming in Translunar Travelers Lounge
When the barn door swings open, you are greeted, as usual, by the sweet green smell of hay undercut by the sharp scent of manure and a half-dozen other woody, mossy and pungent aromas. All of them comforting.
“Ruby?” you ask of the dark, empty barn, your voice at this hour a phlegmy whispering croak. It appears Ruby has performed the magic trick of escaping while the doors were shut.
In her place, towering above you in a wobbling, glowing mass—
Testicles.
Hundreds of them.
Pale. Bulbous. Disturbingly large.
Greetings, they rumble inside your skull, sending uncomfortable vibrations downward. We require your assistance.
You gently close the barn door.